9:05 P.M.
I fell asleep for a few hours.
I woke up still feeling anxious.
I feel so extremely anxious.
I feel anxious to feel ANYTHING at this moment.
I found happiness in a dream.
I had a dream I was working back at Insomnia.
I truly loved my job.
I remember a few years ago when I worked there, I only called in sick once in the entire year I worked the bar.
Man I miss that.
I knew exactly what I was doing, even when it was new to me. I found so much from working there.
I don't remember why I quit...
Oh yes, I quit to make more money doing a desk job with less work and I've pretty much spent most of my time working a desk job since then.
I haven't worked the same desk job for 5 years but I have stayed with the same type of job for the guaranteed paycheck.
Once again, I'm sitting here wondering if there is such a place where I can serve and make enough money to pay my bills and still go to school.
I work so far from home and it's going to be difficult to save any money.
I'm not sure what to do.
Tomorrow I'll go in to tell my boss about my schedule with school.
I guess it all depends on his reaction.
If he can deal with me being less available I'll stick around.
Otherwise I think I'll have to go back to the old dental office working whatever 20 hours a week that I can work into my schedule...
It's no big secret.... I just can't seem to find happiness in a job.
I'm only hoping that this lack of happiness comes with a silly job, and that someday when I have an actual career this feeling may change...
I've taken the slow road to success.
Someday I will get there... Someday I'll get there and call everyone just to tell them, "Hey guys, I'm here and I'm happier than ever!"
My feet have had a day to heal up from the blisters. My shoes continue to eat away at the remaining flesh. I can't believe how bad my feet hurt. I spend a lot of time focusing on my feet and how much they hurt, but I guess things could be a lot worse...
I COULD HAVE TO WALK 5 MILES TO WORK, UP HILL BOTH WAYS. I COULD HAVE NO SHOES AT ALL!
On that note I'm off to find another distraction for a few hours...
I was waiting on Kitty but the doctor just called and asked me to rescue him from the slaughter house.(He doesn't eat red meat....) If Kitty doesn't call within the next few min. I'm outta here to run to the rescue...
